Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
do herpes really smell.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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