I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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