he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
