3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
