He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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