that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
