she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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