What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
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