Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Randomize
