K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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