Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
