ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
