Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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