I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize