Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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