I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
they need to just BURY HIM!
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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