Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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