I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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