are you so shy because you have an std?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I think my moral compass just broke
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
