Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize