All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
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Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
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I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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