the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
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