omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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