I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Randomize
