my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize
