Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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