I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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