so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
