well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize