Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
