if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
These tits shall not be calmed
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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