Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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