she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
