I'm laying in your front yard are you home
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize