and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
