i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize
