Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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