Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
