Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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