went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
