His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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