I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
