Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
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SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
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She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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