Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't

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(614): View more from Ohio

Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.

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(770): View more from Georgia

If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(803): View more from South Carolina

we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper

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(561): View more from Florida

The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever

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(917): View more from New York City

I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.

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(425): View more from Washington

Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...

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