Texts From Last Night

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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.

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  (401): I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on. http://tfl.nu/shul
  Replies (22) Good night (4476) Bad night (1094)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude, I think my check liver light just came on

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  (906): Dude, I think my check liver light just came on http://tfl.nu/539i
  Replies (29) Good night (7805) Bad night (1228)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.

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  (931): I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then. http://tfl.nu/2mcz
  Replies (28) Good night (6009) Bad night (4604)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.

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  (850): 2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers. http://tfl.nu/i0nm
  Replies (4) Good night (1050) Bad night (2298)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding

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  (313): There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding http://tfl.nu/91sj
  Replies (16) Good night (1397) Bad night (3532)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me

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  (903): Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me http://tfl.nu/adub
  Replies (6) Good night (4061) Bad night (850)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background

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  (403): we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background http://tfl.nu/seul
  Replies (10) Good night (2225) Bad night (644)
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  (213): View more from California

  My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."

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  (213): My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie." http://tfl.nu/jevy
  Replies (38) Good night (3603) Bad night (680)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.

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  (713): I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester. http://tfl.nu/tak8
  Replies (2) Good night (819) Bad night (978)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship

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  (204): I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot (1-204): I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship http://tfl.nu/q28b
  Replies (2) Good night (1352) Bad night (579)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.

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  (402): I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story. http://tfl.nu/wp0p
  Replies (11) Good night (645) Bad night (1773)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.

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  (208): I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise. http://tfl.nu/iv1d
  Replies (2) Good night (1029) Bad night (219)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent

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  (907): Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent http://tfl.nu/4dji
  Replies (8) Good night (1171) Bad night (472)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."

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  (512): You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid." http://tfl.nu/wv53
  Replies (4) Good night (1703) Bad night (355)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.

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  (386): I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters. http://tfl.nu/2e4j
  Replies (8) Good night (904) Bad night (300)

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