Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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