May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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