Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize