You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Everything about him screamed your future.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
When are your genitals available?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
