Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
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