At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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