everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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